For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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