what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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