Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
