we have officially lost it.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
