My room smells like vodka and shame
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize