covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
