covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just had sex on a roof
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
