So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
