so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
