Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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