I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
