doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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