the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
