fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize