Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I have aggressive nipples.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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