are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
