you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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