More tranny stories later!
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
