are you still at the devil's house?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
