big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
