Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
