I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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