what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Boobs are out for the taking
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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