nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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