suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
