we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
