Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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