And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
