So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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