so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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