So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
