I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
