That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
