Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
