Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
