So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize