Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
