I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
