There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
