I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
