She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
