Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
