You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
