Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I could fuck to npr.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
