I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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