thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
