My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
