I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
