have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
In other news, I just burned my penis
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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