If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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